Jonathan K. Ficticious

SURPRISE SURPRISE

2008-06-07T23:00:59Z

I told a cooworker today that my longest relationship was a month long. it was probably only 3 weeks, in retrospect. feeling ugly, poor, and despite decadent, expensive things surrounding me, i'm very much unfofilled. upon realizing this, that i've never had a real relationship, i realize quite simply that i probably never will. i'm the kind of person that is perfectly content simply existing, alone, as it always has been. there aren't any bones to be thrown, there aren't any more bones. i'm terrible at this. i realize also that i don't actually have any friends left. i have old friends, acquaintances, cooworkers and the like. but i don't have a single person that checks up on my well-being on a semi-daily basis. there aren't any. i expect very little from people, hoping to be surprised. the image that comes to mind is of me laying or sitting statuesque in one spot, eyeing the void, eyeing the dark, someone simply approaching, who would ask, simply 'are you ok?' the other example i've yet to use; requesting of someone 'look me in the eyes, and tell me what you see.' and i would stare pure and simple into theirs, and maybe, just maybe for long enough, a fleeting glimpse of a tattered, starved, weary young man might reach out to them. i feel, like there isn't anyone in the world for me. i feel, like i'm hungry. i am hungry, but i also feel hungry in a metaphorical sense. my cup is empty. where did all the rum go. i'm running out of gas. i want to go on sabbatical. i want a woman to find me. i want to fly away. these cries for help rarely received, but i still write them, as a record of my discontent. send me an angel, seriously please. all the women are gone, and me all dressed up. *shucks* i'll be a lifelong bachelor if this keeps up. i feel quite dead inside.

TELEPHONE LOGIC

2008-06-01T08:04:05Z

i hate myself for many reasons.

i love myself for far fewer.

there are things i do wrong, repeatedly.

if you go chasing after love, you will never find it.

i am still, very much.

look deep into my eyes, this much you will see.

i try to tell myself, try to find why i waste my affections.

i don't think i will ever, i won't ever be able to.

i don't know who you are anymore.

this man, this man. i think i met him once.

he seemed nice enough. however;

i want to stomp his face in.

i want to stomp his face in.

you would disprove of such.

it's been hard to let go. very hard.

though i guess i never really did, let go.

i want to fucking spell this shit out for you, on paper.

it's precisely what you think it is, but you don't like thinking about it.

thinking about me. i am a pity case. i am a lost cause.

i know you won't ever consider. i just want you to know.

how can i tell you. how can we be friends. the only way that i can get this off my chest.

you have to know. you need to know this. and you need to carry it with you.

if this ever happens, it will not. if it happens, it will inevitably fail on my account.

if that happened, this would all be very, very true.

if it happened.

and suddenly un-happened.

i simply could not function any more as a human being on planet earth.

so let us be glad, for this once, for alcohol and awkwardness.

these things save my life, unbeknownst.

THE ASS END

2008-05-01T10:14:52Z

John Samson

THE ASS END of a 2-person costume

Out floating, we receive a distress call. Cries go unnoticed. Wells are tainted. Regiments fragmented, the stars do not care. The herds are on the move. You forgot my birthday, you know. The illusory nature of things is lifted. What never existed is dying out in number. The dream had ended. How exactly does one come to dominance, what is the shape of it. We were once all snakes, all fish. Stalking through reeds, poised. I am staring at Quetzalcoatl, He has come to us. Two worlds, standing, scrutinizing the fates. Grendel's shadow. Bring the rest, fill the boats. Grand percussion solo; cannonfire, fireworks. Horseless, you say. Best to wear a mask. Returning fire from beneath trenches. Moldy cheese. Horseless, for everyone. What’d ya find, there, Biff? Black stuff, says Biff. Violent nationalism; fanged, horned creature on the loose. There was something dearly wrong with those pigeons. It takes ten officers to finally take him down. They’ve broken into the house now, sacking everything. I ready my gun. And so we scorch the earth today. Then we play golf slowly, take pictures in funny suits. Don’t touch that dial. A grand, methodical spoiling of children. A small step. Paperwork crimes; masked men with flashlights in a hotel room. Increased market penetration, increased sales, increased earnings for fiscal year. Download your persona, download yourself. Unleash your power. 7 cents an hour. International business of politics. At the age of five, carving cardboard automatics, young dog of war. Watch the news, in horror. The day the crystal cracked. The dream has ended. Tomorrow, once good as canned peaches. Dead cities. Remember what it was like; smiles, makeup, well-lit photography. Let us lance the earth as an act of vengeance. Tomorrow not generally a bringer of fine things. They have taken over. No radio, no telephone, no water, no power. We, the scavengers. What’d ya find, there, Bill? Whatever ‘they’ are. It’s an old walkman, says Bill. March the desert, day 1. Still works and everything. We are on a bridge. Return fire from the rooftops, they are all coming at once. We are unique. Pull the pin, push down hard on the clutch, safety off. Hurling themselves toward us with supernatural speed. Open fire. We are alone. Arts and sciences, anthropology, mathematics. Make our way, find a way. Something is gone in them. The band is playing. He’s dead, we couldn’t save him. Lost, you look up at night. We stay where we are, try not to draw attention. You look up. They do not care, out there. We are running low, she is not doing well. Look up at night. They sit up there and watch us, laughing. We are compact. Are they like us? We are unique. Do they walk on two legs? We are all in a line.

THAT'S THE WAY IT OUGHT TO BE

2008-04-30T20:27:06Z

i made my peace with it, with the damn girl. the truth is i loved her heart and soul. she just didn't feel the same about me in the slightest. she'll never know the extent to which i put mental effort and thoughts directed towards her benefit. she'll never see neon genesis evangelion, or macross plus. and i will never watch freaks and geeks. if i can help it. i'm over it, but there is still a sadness in me. it's the same hole that was always there, it's merely wider now. i look at myself in the mirror sometimes, and simply see dark, evil things in me. but i continue on, that i do.

maneatingmonkey @ 2008-04-24T15:17:00

2008-04-24T21:53:59Z

somewhere there is a ghoul, rising. tactless successors ignite long dead pyres. we were having a staring contest, you and i; there was no clear victor. invisible worlds collide with more pressing concerns. you told me you were vising your grandmother that night. that was a lie. you then called me 5 months later, a worse call i cannot imagine nor recall. i was eating a hamburger, you were sitting with your family in brown cordouroy pants, it was not the first time i said "goodbye forever, dear" and that fleeting image of long red hair exiting promptly burned forever in this swampy hall of records. i woke up one morning, eyes fused shut. i would say silently how i felt, the ghoul keeps it in a locked box under a bridge. now held a double-standard, cracked, and in reverse. the ghoul waits. the distance of continents came between us, the legitimacy came unto question, and i, in a fit of rage, got inked. i thought you were at arms reach, i realize now you were never so terribly close. i dropped my sunglasses unto the lake, you smiled, and i never saw you again. asking thor, pleading osiris and bast to send holy valkyrie soul search find rhyme and harmony and reason. yet all there was, was hades. the fellas all told me how it was, what i should do. yet i paid them no mind. you said you got surgery for that perfect C of yours, you the surgeon of zombie-clad garments. ghoul in the wind. i saw you again, you were distant. that final day i was also distant they were all getting drunk on the beach i caught your eye briefly there was a touch of sadness in it. i have not been true to you. i wanted nothing more than to keep you here. yet you had already left. they all leave. there is no one left. no one gets to leave, now, but me. there is a calm beneath, there is a hundred voices. of charlitains and shades, a makeshift jamboree, cracked.

this is a deadening, this is deadening, there are deadenings. friends will notice, acquaintances will not. i visit first with a man, then with a woman. i am fond of hating these two souls. devoid of color, all is crackers. i watch myself go, it is good. i do not require what i formerly did. i am not subject to the same laws. a vortex opens, i welcome it. i would eat them as directed. afterwards, i decided on the green grass, the trees, the sand and the sky to eat. the sand was there, though i had no likening to it. the green grass was walked on, not so much spoken of. i take a bite out of the sky, it bleeds, i drink. i am pleased to enact this veil, this shroud. all is in the shade. no grass, only sand. it is me and the sand and i yell out, i call out. the howling gale heeds my reply: "if sand is what you seek, it is all that you will see." we're running out of food. all of our cups are broken. i retreat unto a holy place, sanctuary, and leave the guts of the rest to someone else. i take a bite out of it, it bleeds.

heavy cruisers slag orbital stations from beyond the veil. the keycard he gave me is not the right one. a large tusked creature hurls a spear at you. typing ferociously, lines of code spewing like the guts of grendel himself. a fireworks display. widespread panic, a government mole forwards the nessassary files to you. ships descend. bring me my longsword. colors invert, greyscale darkens. i am again now afraid of things. the void calls, every last one. scorched minions swim up from the deep, smoking. we're taking on water.

a double-take sparks unforseen gusto. admiring museum-like the shambles in awe you ask questions. a powderous injection of CO2 gas. the magician, smiling, uncloaks his assisstant. if i am expectant of such, it will not come. a pile of boxes awaits your arrival. she came back to me. thrust your desire out the window, abandon all selves, shake free this skin of envy, silence the rest. there comes a time, comes a place. the body expands beyond its confines, the world shuts off, the sound of nothing faintly glows. it is nice here, you wish to stay.

YAARRRRRRRR

2008-03-31T05:17:18Z

i'm grouchy, i'm grumpy, goddammit. all i see is beans. i'm stressed out. i shoot people the glare a lot. illnesses. i need more leafy greens. to be healthy for a period. eat more vegetables. buy local. we set off the fire alarm today. it was loud. i get to wear an eye patch tomorrow. YARRRR. when i wake up, i might not be able to see out of both eyes. like a dead man. when you wake up, you might be blind, like me. or a dead man. i keep telling people i will use my tax return to buy a keyboard, but i will buy a 60GB playstation 3 instead. the keyboard is a rouse. i say that i will not, but i know that i will. i absolutely must have a 60GBPS3. i haven't had very much time for reading. reading is good. demon hunting is nice. i like unicorns best. i should also say, i think i'm in love. with a unicorn, that is. this will be the second time i will give a woman pink eye. also a black one too. i cross my fingers and hope it is not so, that i alone will defeat my pink eye, become an antibody. immuno-defense boost. i place my braincase right next to theirs. we feast upon the flesh of mortals. we are laid back. we are immaculate. we are all in a line. trust in tomorrow. enter the fist. YARRRRR.

ODE TO A CO-WORKER

2008-03-16T21:42:25Z

i'm sick as a dog,
i'm grouchy
i'm a goddamn st. patty's day
curmudgeon

it's been.... 4 days
and i'm dizzy most of it
but i don't care, because i'm
a curmudgeon

woman robs me of thoughts
do i go to camp?
or do i stay
"what good would come of it"
d'ja ever see

'wet hot american summer'

so i've been drinking lots of
fluids
and eating out of
cans
and stumbling around like there just ain't no
tomorrow

i realize i have huge amounts
of animosity towards
certain people
that i must air these grievances:

he's stealing my hours
and my fucking woman
he does not deserve
any of it
motherfucking
arrogant
young
punk

i realize i have 5 years on him
his buddy is a fucking asshole
and i want to fight him too
there are few i would call
enemies
fewer still; nemesis

"do you know what nemesis means"

i need someone to talk to
otherwise i'll do something
foolish
or simply tell these fucking
pigs
straight-up

"do you have any dignity left,
you bottle-fed, arrogant piece of dogshit?"

"are you a man of honor?"

y'see i like to think
humility is one of the most
desirable human traits
nobody ever likes anybody
who goes around saying "this is why i'm so fucking great"

these, are the worst,
i personally show no remorse
in hating these young masterless dogs
for i feel

that anyone who builds himself up
as such
shall be rightfully
broken down, down, down
again

LEARN SOME RESPECT YOU
ARROGANT
MOTHERFUCKING
YOUNG PUNK

I NEED MORE MANA

2008-02-20T09:03:26Z

"every one, every time"

"with renewed resolve"

girls don't realize how much power they actually have over me. especially the super self-confident ones. i can think on more than one occasion i came unto a staring contest with a woman, one with no clear victor. does that mean something? does it simply mean that i have dreamy eyes? probably. or does it mean that i truly have my own certain magnetic persona, and that most people don't have the patience to truly appreciate it. i'm a goddamn catch, i am. yet, i rarely feel as such.

so i wait i continue to wait with endless positivity endless resolve there must be someone in this fair mountain city for me i know it i just know it. "give me love" she said, once. "give me love". baby, there is nothing more i would rather do than precisely just that. "give me love," she said.

"my tract record
in the bedroom
is spotty
at best"
~JS 02/11/08

similarly so, my tract record of the heart, is spotty at best. i've overstepped my bounds, i've been a flake, i've been ignorant, noncommunicative, i've been a boorish, drunken oaf, i've been a useless, philandering assclown, i've selfishly confessed my undying love to people i rightfully have no right to do so to. conversely so, i've met women i could love forever, and be content living on a pittance in the worst of situations, if only for them. without their slightest knowledge of the purity of my thoughts and feelings on the situation. i refuse to let go of a certain unhealthy romantic fixation on a certain friend of mine. i refuse to let go of a certain spicy latin bride of mine. i refuse to let go of sabrina. i refuse to let go of that charming redhead 'o mine.

do the fates call in such a way? will i ever know the sweet sweet kiss of purest love 'o mine? will there ever be, simple, quiet moments, bittersweet, sensual moments, where i mentally pantomime 'i love this woman' repeatedly? will i ever kiss goodbye the longest days of solitude, of gently metaphorically rocking myself to sleep, only to forget this dilemma mine for another day? am i truly that ugly? are my clothes truly that frumpy? does my obsessive videogame collector ubergeekdom prevent me from this? is that all you see, is every single chink in my armor, my every single flaw, my one and only, or would you rather my truest self? which do you see, which do you seek? answer me, ye black hearted young rapscallion gods, in whatever haphazard ways you deem deserved.

t'is hard for a man to walk while others waltz.

"i don't know how to waltz" he says to nobody in particular.

sweet young thing, in a red dress with lips and nails to match: "come, i'll teach you"

it is the burden of dreams onto the mind, at first. to want, to desire, to have and hold that which you do not. out of touch, out of heart, out of sight, out of mind. to others, seems entirely natural. others still, awkwardness rises in them at inopportune moments, and a baseline of self bores itself a hole. standard modes and themes dictate much the same, until crazy, desperate measures are taken. these inevitably end in a kindof cruel utility; one can't broaden one's standards, without realizing why such standards and measures are there in the first place. i widen my standards, let all trees fall in the surrounding wood, despite clearing acres upon acres, i still cannot find my one and only.

were there such a thing as a divining rod, surely i would use it. were there such a thing as a psychic, surely i would consult him. were there a dream called this, surely i would wake up, and remember a lifetime of my beloved all over again, even if moments before the true death. were i god, the truest manifestation of the underlying creative force that binds all things, i would tell them all. they would fight to the death.

o truest, sweetest, most purest springtime love, find me, find me, find me where i am find me where i stand find me where i be find me find me find me. i promise you the world. i give you myself, an offering from odin. i give myself to the cause, i give myself to the universe, i give myself to you. if only, only, you will find me. it remains obvious as i am unskilled in such matters. i leave it to you, my lady. i leave it to you. find me, where i am most likely to be found, in such a way that the likelihood of a mutual bad reception highly unlikely, find me where i am, find me where i am most apt to be found. i can't say, i can't know, maybe it's, perhaps we haven't met yet, or perhaps we have, one can never know. only in retrospect do we find peace.

o truest, sweetest, most purest springtime love, find me.

GOIN' BACK TO CALI

2008-02-15T21:14:06Z

part 2

we allowed ourselves to become enamored, it was pretty simple. she did every thing completely right, and i did everything i probably wouldn't do otherwise. i asked her out, in a word, and that became that. we met up for drinks, i didn't have any money, so she bought me 2 drinks, we talked we had some laughs we got to know each other in that short brief time that i never wanted to end. not because it was perfect not because i was perfect not because it was the best time of my life but because i liked her and i was enjoying myself and i sensed that she was enjoying herself all the same. i didn't want it to end, because i would never be back to this place, in a general kindof metaphoric sense. i've been out in california for a week, and it teased me into thinking i might find someone i could love out here. i love that girl, like so many others i never had the time to tell, and i really wonder if we'll ever see each other, seriously. i'm lonely, i'm searching for love, won't you love me, let me be, with you (etc.). i'm beginning to think that i know perfectly how to charm women, that i know perfectly how to be good to them, that i know perfectly where to go and what to say, simply that i never before had the confidence in myself and in my abilities, yet i do now. it's time.... to lay a thick layer of mac on unsuspecting denver-area co-eds. damn right.

CARRY ON, CARRY ON

2008-02-02T03:58:02Z

there is a great distance between my mind, my heart, and my body. the three of them have been squabbling for quite some time, and it might just be time to let them do their own thing. there is a great chasm, one that reaches all the way down to the void. the mariana trench. i'm hungry. i'm thirsty. i'm jonesing.

yet there is very little for me, i try every single time, and yet there are none. i dream of talking to priests, of being in the company of holy men. when the sun is out, i dream of terribly attractive women, intelligent, glowing. and yet there are none.

i've never had a real girlfriend in my life, and this saddens and pains me to a great degree. should i be expectant of such? or should i put my mind on other things, to have "it" take me by surprise. "the love of my life", is thousands upon thousands of miles away. if no man is an island, how long is this one doomed to float around the 7 seas, to meander to shore finding nothing but empty tin cans and burnt out corpses.

i have all this bread, y'see. i'd love to find someone to break it with, share some. and yet there are none.

there is little love left in life. there is always a love for life, yet love in life is a certain subtle thing to find. some people find it, then lose it. the luckiest sons of bitches, find it, and keep it. and i'd be willing to bet that a large margin of people of this earth, might never find it at all. for those; pray. just pray.

i'm caught in the grips of the city, madness. street lamps and cigarette vending machines offer no consolation to the wounded of heart and ego. i try to imagine blondes in sun dresses on some tire swing in oklahoma in a field of tall grasses, yet all i see is neon lights, all i hear is the senseless chatter of the mob. oh, how i'd like to get away, and walk the earth just enough as to fall face-first into such a woman, and to have her charm me with her feminine wiles, to completely toy with my emotions, days, weeks, and months after having already made her decision. me an unwitting pawn, a rat in a maze, 5 right turns, 6 left, and 3 straight at a 4-way junction from a block of cheese the size of texas. i'm stuck in this web of the city, unbeknownst to me, death lingers in hiding. somewhere, deep underground, lies a single, burning jewel that powers everything. will i cry tonight, will i cry tomorrow, will a shadow of pity and mercy the future bring. carry on, carry on, "hang in there kitty". the wind in the willows blows from underneath, and the jewel now, is but a faerietale.

carry on, carry on.

the shape of things to come is not set
the jewel will set you free
the diamond in the rough
diamond in the rough
diamond in the rough
diamond in the rough

BATSHIT CRAZY

2008-01-25T03:09:46Z

i think i've sprung a gear or two loose. seriously.

LETS KEEP THIS SOPHISTICATED

2008-01-07T08:52:56Z

trying to catch up on 10ish years of videogame history is the financial equivalent of trying to catch up on 10 years of vigorous cocaine abuse. they both cost money. and i guess that's where the similarities end. i guess.

lets, well, start in the middle. i've been working somewhere which allows me certain advantages in said habit (the videogames, not the cocaine)(i don't do cocaine). while seemingly a novel idea in theory the simple economy of the situation overpowers reasonable limits, or logic. i'm dying for: a gold zelda trifoce nintendo DS, a white slim PSP with darth vader graphic, and 2 allotted games for each system. a few random accessories. 60GB PS3. omfg i've never been more excited for anything in my life. except....

i think i just pledged myself to a lovely south american girl. we were so... smitten by each other, it was kindof ridiculous. i've now opened the door for the possibility of something long term with this girl. she accepted on all fronts. i've got to get to know this girl more. it's completely insane, stupid, in just about every single way. and yet i consider it the quest of a lifetime. something that would hit strong and hard as something that would be infinitely good for both parties involved and continually improve in life in almost every conceiveable way. i'm still a kid, really, and so is she, and yet, solving this problem of proximity will take all the adult in the both of us. if patience truly wins over, and we do end up together before we're both 30, i wonder. i feel like this is the beginnings of a love for the ages. that and a million other stupid things. she is bar none the most beautiful girl i have ever been with. there is something infinitely sweet and mischeivious about her, something that caught my eye from very far away when we first met, and spent hours together here and there over a period of weeks. did i mention how drop-dead gorgeous she is? because she is, and through the fog of these months i struggle to comprehend how she feels the same way about me. it's a longshot, but hey, i guess i'm a romantic, yes.

that, as something to simply shelve and put away and work for is such a subtle, life-altering event, it's like having a spouse at war, or a lover in a far off country... guess it's not like that's what it is. i dream of another life we would live together... somewhere somewhat feral, where we would cook and have coffee and go on roadtrips on weekends. somehow our love would only grow, our creativity pouring out of us like an overcrowded vessel of icewater, and we would plant seeds of love and hope and good faith the world over. the end. i'm still young, and idealistic, in every way.

is it unrealistic or idealistic or fool-hearted or stupid to love someone for reasons you're not entirely sure of? is it not something we all should aspire to, the truest, purest love? is love not what binds the world together? what would tear it apart, then? is love reasonable, is love logical? is love biological? psychological? is it something we can call real? or is it fictional? if love is imaginary, does that make it nonexistant? how can we quantify love? is it desire? or simply, following your dreams? if i'm free from attachment, can i still be attached? what time is it, it feels like dawn.

i feel as if it has happened before, me softly repeating to myself into an audience of soft curley hair "i love this woman" etc. etc. or how about the kicking-myself-for-not-stating-what- was-obviously-meant-to-be-said-but-was-left-unsaid maneuver. if i promise myself this, then one single aspect of my adult life is assured, and as good as it will ever be. i feel stupid, crazy, stupid again for this, but my gut, my intuition seem to be happy, relieved, and at peace with the wild, madcap idea. there is also the completely irrelevant, marginal appeal of people just seeing us together, and being completely stunned, basically. maybe not so irrelevant. she really is just plain a knockout. she somehow easily just rose to the pile of most beautiful girls of life, easily. stupid, idiotic, crazy, stupid again. cheers, everybody. to loving people.

so i guess i've got a lot of work to do. this may just be what i needed to strengthen my resolve. my resolve was already strong, it's just... stronger now. i think, once i'm satisfied with finishing large game expendatures, that i'll start to save every penny, and visit this wonderful girl i call mine in the summer, if even for 2 weeks or so... also the weird problem of explaining it to everybody. it seems so natural, yet stupid again. i love this girl, completely and totally. i'm a fool, yet folly will not catch up to me. fool me once, you're the fool. fool me twice, we're both fools. who's cooler than a fool? seriously.

fritz the cat - good movie if you wanna see cartoon character animals having orgies and shooting up junk and beating the shit out of each other with chains. B+
katamari damacy - worth playing. period. it's katamari, you roll up an enormous ball of junk, which eventually sticks to hurricanes and small islands. it's actually the origins of lord cosmos, in a way. cosmos was always my power word. A+
vagrant story - they called it "medieval gear solid" which is, in a way, a very apt title. at least not from a gameplay standpoint, as there are no stealth elements whatsoever to vagrant story. there is moderate platforming, and box puzzles. yet VS is every bit as much MGS when it comes to storytelling, characterization, cinematics, and overall tightness of gameplay and replay value. though, weirdly enough the camera angles are kindof oddly similar in a weird way. vagrant story is a superb action dungeon crawler squaresoft RPG that uses many, many strategic elements, timed button presses, forging your own weapons and armor, fairly deep magic system (it's no FF). it's basically one of the greatest games ever made. basically. A++

to love, and good women.

NATURELAND

2007-11-18T01:39:46Z

if i could rewrite the past 6 years of my life, i would. jealousy runs thick in me, as well as spite, sadness. i would erase every bad deed, every "failed romance" and listen to my one purest heart every moment. as continued on this path, i would simply find happiness, wholeness, fofillment. if i create my reality, i must have created this. o, shame, dearest stars, sincere apologies. this gift of life is not known to be just one or everlasting, eternal; thus we must cherish every sacred moment, tired or not, downtrodden or not. you are the purest, most relaxing calmest lovingest most perfect rainbow of humanity, you contain within you the life force of thousands of star systems, you are greater, more intelligent, faster, stronger, and more pure of heart than any other. you are made from earth, and your intelligence and freedom of choice allows nothing to be impossible, through sheer force of will, focus, hard work, devotion, you can create anything you see. and in so realizing that, the capacity for life and the goodness and lessons in everything, the majesty of the world the majesty of the universe is captured in you, utterly captivating to anyone who sees. oh, dream myself awake, not asleep but dreaming, i am the eternal living divinity manifest in physical form, i see everything, i know precisely where i am, what day it is and where exactly i am going. i am the sum total of every human virtue and character trait, i am the god-head, the entire judeo-christian trinity, and the supreme all-seeing intelligence of the entire pantheon of every faith in all the universe.

and yet, physically i can feel something missing, downtrodden, heartbroken, distressed, feeling my place in the world slipping slowly away, i feel i will never know the comraderie of truest friendship, i will never know the love of a woman, and that my dreams are dying more and more every day. this life is becoming a heavy suitcase i carry with me everywhere i go, all the little stupid nuances of my days add up to me hating myself for being in this position, all the stupid garbage of life doesn't interest me, for i prefer to live in my sacred little science fiction dreamworld of attainable goals, lists, and the passage of time. it is as i feared.

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?

Or fester like a sore--
and then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load

Or does it just explode?

when i was younger, i was a dreamer. now that i am a man i have no need for childish things. my dreams are phantoms, haunting me when i'm at my worst. i'm capable of so much, yet i'm attaining so little. where is, the straw that broke this camel's back, where is his missing piece, what is the algorithm to it all, how can i make my own dreams into reality? is it really true? can we really find a way back home again?

"that'll do, pig. that'll do."

maneatingmonkey @ 2007-10-08T00:06:00

2007-10-08T06:25:08Z

motherfuck shit ass motherfucker ass fucking peepee cunt robbing shit farming piece of shit assfarmer eating up fuck ass chips of assjuice crust in a pissass goddamn poopoo shitpile shithole in the shittiest shit pile shit-up shitterarium shithole shit in all the shittiest shit shats ever shat by the shattingest shit-shats that ever shatted a shit shatting shiterola up a greasy telephone pole.

"we'll cross the river here, then cut a swaft through that leafy green grass field out there, and rendezvous with the red dragon sometime after sunset."

maneatingmonkey @ 2007-10-01T23:30:00

2007-10-02T06:41:34Z

the brown bear melted out a disturbing amount of fog. "snally that" said the bear. an 8 foot tall rabbit produced a handkerchierf, and fargled it around his kinargin like a skrinopple dooglie doo. they continued to skinarple down the dark and skraggety scroop network. "my, there's an awful amount of fog around this fod, isn't there my putruid, unevolved neandertal smear of smeg, arent' we old boy?" the rabbit was himself wearing a perfectly yammy shim shammy of foul, rotten smelling shit which was now dripping down in large piles on the crizopple. "i'll skite that, ye pretty boy skitin' piece of sewer skite who'd ne'er skit skatted at nzat if his puny reptile existence had ever dreamed of skit skattin' with the big skites aroun' the top'a th' greeht skite pile inna skoy is it dere ol' putra. i'll be skit skattin' in another man's scum when my bum ain't skit skattin' up dere widda big skats, ey. you can stick that in' your shithole and scarf us out of a skit skattin's weasely for nine, you ol' pile'a puke."

the bear and the rabbit hated each other, no doubt. but they both realized that they were the only ones in all of bongotown or earth that could save them from the dreaded larmus. the larmus has 29 heads, each deadlier than the next, each imbued with different elemental farts each deadlier than the deadliest combination of all the different deadly things, all spewing moxic mojo fog at the glandliest dupedefier shitkicking r-tard idiot who decides to play hero with any one of them, much less all 29 of them. this creature comes from the 29th dimension. it comes, from the 29th dimension of the most far off skit skat in the entire almalgamation of universes. it comes to declar war.

so the rabbit and the bear are going to talk to the larmus, in the most highestly advanced peepee suits that the entire bongoland communist republic ever came to cromulently crunkify the stars and beyond. their shoddy, rusted, ill-concieved, ill-piloted space vehicle looked like a piece of scum skitskatting in circles on a pile of puke, then rolled into a drab, featureless tin can which, despite the relative technology involved, still looks like a scrabblety scroob scrim scrombing off a scramdam nabobadom scrim scramin' it's way through a fart salad while it's computeh pahts're fry'n uppa coupla super scroob lightehnihn tablets inna middle of a scrim scrammin'n beladongeh. their ship has crash landed.

the rabbit and the bear are walking a simple pathway carpeted with red carpet red like the color qualrinac red. the rabbit was eating a carrot that looked suspiciously like torso of an animal of some kind, the bear was wearing a helmet of some kind, made of some exotic looking scrobulous jade scroobeley-doo. the rabbit was wearing a faded orange parka vest, his diaper, he put a clean diaper on but still has lots of shit around his legs and still reeks of shit and piss he keeps fart cigars up his ass and smokes 27 of them at a time, and some sweatpants covered in all stains condiments blood red wine white wine MD20/20 spritzers all kinds of skaggedy scrop doggle-dy doo all kinds of poo on his pants, which hovered around his ankles perpetually.

they were walking in some stupid cave in the dark, while bloodsucking flesheating laser eyed super pirhana shark octopus intelligent seareptile people fixing to squeriouyouiyip our skibideray's and scrob the skitopolis on our skwidiberet's. "i waihl taihl youyoya theiouweri this skrip skrap skrubidung drop a swibideret's skit skatting all along my srubeyeloupis skwibideret's cinniminarle telemisdriarchal frigminigingis. scrorb norb nies forgesargmargloruke-iss. flignarmlarngarningis flargmarniginargis. teliargorbalucas. skit skattin' at the scrubidube margilinigutas at the scubidube marsh marsh targinibiluoles scrap the skribidube marsh del yo-you yo yarloga duba skiming scrarp skrip skrap scrabbatabulouso skwidiberet.

i'm an astronaut rockstar bodybuilder nobel prize winning superhero from the planet awesome. i eat 25 balanced breakfasts every day, i eat 48 tons of dogshit and mulch every hour, i weigh as much as this fist hitting you in the face like a runaway frieght train running at 168 million billion kilogram minute seconds killing you instantly as you even begin to mention my weight. i eat large predatory animals after i crush them either with my fists or my asshole. i have 8 billion children, they are all retarded. my home planet is made of cheesecake and i live in a castle the size of the universe out of cheesecake that i eat constantly and now need to survive. i cannot be killed, but i die sometimes, but i just come back if i have an extra life so i'm just always ok i have mad skilz. my earwax is dynamite. my nose is made of silk.

i eat dogshit for breakfast i make dogshit sausages i feed to my dogshit wife in our dogshit house out where our dogshit dog eats dogshit and poops out dogshit on our dogshit carpet which lies on our dogshit hardwood floors and goes into our dogshit foundation made of dogshit dirt which dogshit people eat with their dogshitball hands and dogshit spoons they have dogshit fights when it's dogshit cold outside during dogshit season. dogshit people fornicate using dogshit rubbers and dogshit pot pies and dogshit hot pockets and dogshit spaghetti with dogshit sauce on the dogshit side. i like to have dogshit sandwiches for lunch with dogshit chips and dogshit water with dogshit dip sauce on the dogshit side. i tell people dogshit stories and drive a dogshit car. i wear dogshit underwear and sleep in a dogshit bed. i went to dogshit island once but i had a dogshit fever and had to see the dogshit doctor with his dogshitty dogshittery dogshitting my shim sham dogshit shit. i like to see dogshit when i am walking, i think of dogshit all day even when i am fucking my dogshit wife, i keep dogshit money in my dogshit wallet and wash myself with dogshit soap once in a blue dogshit moon. sometimes i go out and spend dogshit amount of dollars for dogshit on a dogshit stick. people tell me i'm dogshit, i say they're complete dogshit dogshit. it's all dogshit scroobtubular scrim scramiamadamlucaslucas.

"who are you?" said the rabbit.
"i'll be takin' a shit in this skitin skazzbag's lap if i'm not the skitiest skiter outta skim skam island that ever knew a skit skattin' skazzbag if he saw one. yah're deahd t'me. "

"regrettable, for you see, i am here to take you pumdung pile's o' puke what you're shit says forever. i hate you so much, but i will help you. the virtual reality future needs a new diarrhea hero for its kelodrams, while we fistargle our flinoogles on flim flammety flop flap day. i'm here to show you the skrappy dogshit key to the dogshit computer that rules the entire universe."

"you see, the universe is all more than infinity universes all dogshitted up inside of a giant dogshit computer kept in the dogshittiest universal caverns, where god keeps a dogshit computer capable of adding numbers together, where mighty secrets behold in its depths. there, retarded supercomputer engineers make a dogshit computer out of diapers as a model then make the real one out of dogshit 950 billion years later. their brains are made out of real dogshit so they are smarter than you and me and that dogshit eating pile of dogshit friend you have there. so, listen. i'm actually a robot made out of hyperadvanced dogshit metal from the dogshit future.
i'm on a mission from god. won't you take my dogshit hand, and cut it off, so that you may drink of the milken dogshit nectar from gods million dollar dogshit tree in his dogshit mansion on dogshit island. here, take this hyperadvanced cardboard dogshit metal spoon, and cut my dogshit hand off so that you may drink of the milken dogshit nectar inside. hurry!"

the cardboard metal dogshit spoon didn't have to cut through his dogshit wrist, as his hand fell off anyway. his body was made of light like a light bulb like gods teeth and the inside was all rainbows and plasminoids all changing all dogshit smell taste touch texture. milken nectar smelling and tasting of liquid dogshit all rainbow plasminoid light spacetime brew drooping from its cromulent excrement stump. the rabbit and the bear drank.

this man, enormous double chin, plastic hair, superhero costume, diaper, and poop gun, had a poop mustache with a poop tie drawn on a white collared shirt was eating a raspberry poop sandwich with poopsticks and poop sauce. he was covered in, and smelled like poop. he was a poop salesman.

"i'm on a mission from god" said the poop salesman.

BAD DOG NO BISCUITS

2007-09-13T05:52:48Z

working these days
such is bad, such is good

lots of other loose ends to tie up

i'm still kindof searching
for that special someone
now that i think i've found her
i'm terrible in my mind's eye

snappy dresser, pretty;
adorable, stylish, mac user
english studies
and i'm all thumbs
foot in my mouth

not just yet
simply the fear of that
i need others to be happy
and a good woman
is something i've not been having
as of late

so yes, desire, to woo
without being overly so
to charm, without enchantment
to simply show how i am
who i am and
the charm to be
just mutual

as once was said
"my love life is the barren tundras
of northern asia; not a soul
to be seen nor heard
'hello' i call out
but not a single reply amidst
the howling gale"

oh, people talk
of how i've never had
someone, really
not at this moment, no
not really ever

i was with a woman
once, and i remember
we started talking
and i ended up just opening up
that whole
ball of wax

i felt really good afterwards
liberated, just wonderful
really
because deep down
i have a need for
fofilling human relationships
a need that,
recently has not been filled

in short;
all the elements of a decent
kindof life are
coming together in themselves
the two missing components;
a woman
and a music
to call my very own

any tips/advice/leads as to how to
achieve these two modest goals
are/will be greatly
appreciated

as the one i am after
may just be far superior
to myself

who knows.......

TC^2 IS NO MORE

2007-07-24T06:47:10Z

this summer;
has been a great waste
and yet i suppose i'm learning
a lot
and all the same
doing practically
nothing with
myself

i read the first two books
in the hyperion cantos
by dan simmons
full review soon
in short;
thrilling, gripping
top of the heap
coloradan science fiction
like nothing else
i have been wanting to
read
the whole of my life
this has opened the door
both for science fiction
and reading as well

i plan to read constantly
from now on
of all things
great and small
so that maybe someday
i can say something like

"here lies one
whose name was writ
in water"

and know who it was that said that

i started playing world of warcraft in april
these are my favorite characters i've made so far;
gaiagul lv56 Night Elf Rogue
lanik lv12 Dwarf Hunter
juansito lv12 troll shaman
Michelle lv18 Blood Elf Paladin
Coolworld lv3 Troll Hunter
and so on...

i find the typical pitfalls
of these massively multiplayer online games
to be quite annoying
as generally
they are harder;
more challenging
much longer
seemingly more rewarding
and infinitely more interesting
than most other games

i say most because
i'm working on one more
final fantasy VI, or final fantasy III
depending on how you look at it
this one, i like more than anything
i'm so completely impressed and engrossed
i'm afriad there's things i'm missing
but lets see....
more characters than i'm used to in
a typical final fantasy game
some of which are simply so
intrinsically charming
i'm glad they're there
i hope this is a trend
we'll see more of
in the future
it's originally a super nintendo game
by the way
but i'm playing it on gameboy
for portability

i don't have a job
i'm doing crummy in school
i frankly have no direction in my life
i spend each day trying to synthesize some sense
of comfortable routine
peaking itself regularly
with beers on the weekends
friends and such
yet i wonder
of the future

of 3 months from now
if i'll be doing better
if i'll have a decent job
if i'll be dating someone, if ever
if i'll have mastered
the dream state

"what if...?"
o what if, what if, what if

of 25 months from now
if i'll be married
if i'll be in the united states
if i'll be done with school
if i'll have a better car
if i'll have had my heart broken
or repaired
if i'll be a martial arts superstar
if i'll have my own house...

or 7 years from now
will there still be a government?
will my friends and family members still be around?
will there still be things like electricity
and the internet
will there be peace
or
will there still be warring
or will that all have stopped entirely

i'm reading about astral travel and such
i paid for this book, once
not this time, though
my dreams have been getting exponentially more memorable
and yet i don't write them down,
despite buying myself a brand new dream journal
i want friends to help me in this regard
as there are those with a natural affinity
for nonphysical lives

someday
i'll be able to sit down
for a 20 minutes nap at lunchtime
and pick up right where i left off
in the astral
or higher
and everytime i go to sleep
i will simply have a period of
transition
and then wake up
in my dreams
and either create
my own dream realities
or travel the various nonphysical realms
and eventually
a snowball effect will take hold of me
and i will be recharged nightly
with psychic and other forms
of energy
and i will learn the most intimate
secrets of the universe
from teachers
the likes of which haven't yet been
imagined by me
and i consider myself a pretty imaginative person

so all i can do
is aim for the top
and remember these things
every day
so i resolve
to wake up energized
and make my way in this world
and purge myself
of every negative thought
to unite both hemispheres of my brain
use body, mind, spirit, and others alike
to create my own
perfect world of unending love and harmony
and personally see to it
that humankind survives another million years or so
that, would be unexpectedly nice

oh well, here's to fixing holes and such

SAMSON ALERT SAMSON ALERT TESC TESC TESC

2007-06-14T04:21:12Z

SAMSON ALERT SAMSON ALERT CALLING ALL CARS CALLING ALL CARS TESC TESC TESC 6-14-07-6-20-07 BE ON THE LOOKOUT APB SAMSON, JOHN. TALL, INTRUSIVE WILD BASTARD, WITH 6 INCH INCISORS, 12 INCH SLASHING CLAWS AT THE BASE OF THE WRIST, MAN IS ARMED AND DANGEROUS, REPEAT 4-ARMED AND DANGEROUS. SSSAMSON ALERT SAMSON ALERT, TESC TESC TESC.

DREAMING OF THE GODDESS

2007-05-27T18:59:01Z

once again, i think i fucked up. "S-M-S" i know her full name, what city she lives in, even her age, and yet i have no way of finding that blonde-haired goddess golden flowing sugary locks that held me in suspense, ever so careful of my diction and all mannerisms, ultimately thinking i may have charmed her, and now i'm left with nothing but the memory of a thousand dreams about her, i simply wonder if she may have too. alas, such is the story of my life in my idiotic romantic relations, too shy to make a substantial gesture, something concrete, yet desperate enough, lonely enough, to simply talk a stranger's ear off. so, i ask the universe once more, cruel, unforgiving, unending universe, let me find a simple footpath back to this beautiful girl i met the evening previous, so that i may bask in such locks, woo her with dreams of quetzals and coatls, and generally fall back into deepest purest love love love once more, so that i may release my sadness unto the universe, unto the divine. "......." "it is like air, it is like water"

GREETINGS FROM THE STARSHIP RAGNAROK

2007-05-25T22:46:45Z

i've been in hades far too long
i must return to valhalla, to yggdrasil
the eyes of olympos watch over me
tears of failure, a screaming, desperate act
catching my breath, shreds of madness set in
summertime doldrums, and a general dreadful feeling
i lost this battle, the war sets in
my youth is no more
tears of grief, for a dying Old Earth
the sons of man scattered, brainless
i beg of you, Gods of Olympos,
i beseech you, universe
unyielding, uncaring, unending
smile upon me, in the months to come
for this weeping willow stands apart
from the rest
end this pitiful dream of man
so that i may awaken again,
knight of valhalla
to dream the dream of dreams
evermore, forever after...

LEVEL 27

2007-04-12T11:50:04Z

level 27. i keep having flashbacks to earlier days, days where fun was constant and real. i live inside my head, in a hazy groggy fogged out bubble, where nothing is constant, moments come and go like waves in the ocean. putting things into words does not come as easily as it used to. i crave balance, i crave enrichment, i crave to see those who i admire and respect and love as friends every day. school is a nightmare. it feels like freshman year academically. in that i'm doing terribly. and yet, that seems the least of my worries.

my mind is on the future, not the present. i was told that my heart was in the right place, and that simply my mind needs to catch up. i know this to be true, yet i find it worries me. lots of things worry me lately. there are worlds within worlds, realms upon realms to explore. the real world is chaos to me i can barely understand it. my own life is the same as ever, i'm still that solitary thoughtful child who doesn't mind playing on his own. i see the suffering in others, and it makes me want to cry. the thing that worries me most, is the thought that i'm wasting away, that i'm not in the right place, not in the right field, that god and the universe has a completely different plan for me. i just wish i knew what that is, really.

i look around me in this prison cell of the mind at play artifacts of life and the information age surround me. it's as if these objects of my life are struggling to find their purpose as well. i feel arrogant to assume that i'm higher advanced than others in certain respects when the truth of the matter is i don't know what to do with these skills and tendencies i've accrued over the years. "i blame my parents" some would say. now i know i can't do that i simply must forge on ahead in life and grab the bull by the horns. life just isn't what it used to be.

i keep having these dreams about food and money friends and happiness. all things i have very little of these days. but i see a difference between being sad/depressed and just not as happy as i've ever been. i'm almost to the point where i need to change everything completely. i'm anticipating the summer very badly. i want to play music. i want to have dinner parties. i want to have a beautiful girl at my side. whenever i seem to have one, i always feel grossly undeserving, and retreat into myself once again. someone called me a little while ago. i realized that i always had strong feelings, but fucked everything up immensely. that girl, that intense feeling of attraction and discovery that followed do i miss more than anything. call it peak experience if you like. working with kids, traveling, making new friends, playing music, and many other things i remember so real so intense it made me feel alive.

now i lack these experiences in daily life. i could easily say that i reached a point of stagnation of my own doing, if only to know what that's like. now i know i must strive to see the world in full color once more, to climb every mountain, to sail every sea etc. i always expect that that kindof excitement would be plentiful upon death, just the same as in dreams. my cup is almost empty right now. i'm getting older, it seems. i feel an enormous gravity pulling me to all the wrong directions. i'd even consider going back into therapy, if only to have someone to really talk to. i find myself slipping into super serious questions of life with people i don't see very often. i found myself with someone on saturday, crying profusely. i could not help myself.

if change is such a thing
as to bring anything
then sames will be the same
as the same as nothing
look deep inside the self
and listen to the heart
for a path is not a path
if it is not a path of heart
forget the outside world
forget thought forget worry
if only for a moment
go back to the place
where everyone you know
is there waiting for you
smiling and laughing
"and you don't need to say a word"
and yet people hang on your every
in life and in death
you will find the divine
but only if you choose to
keep close watch on it
don't let it escape
fill your cup once more
every day
and listen to the sound
hold fast to the memory of
"you are loved more than you think"
"you are a beautiful human being"
remember God, remember birth,
remember those who have came
and those who have gone
and be thankful for all
for all was not none

TO QUOTE A MAGOGG TURNED WAYIST

2007-03-29T07:59:00Z

sometimes i feel like there jus' isn't enough love to go around in the world. so many souls in torment i see, to little time to act too little knowledge too little wisdom too little love. i think of those who've given me love so casually so matter-of-factly it makes me sick to think of myself. such is the state of the world, and probably the universe as well. "hard to see, the dark side is"

My pain belongs to the divine. it is like water, it is like air.
my pain belongs to the divine. it is like water, it is like air.
my pain belongs to the divine. it is like water, it is like air.

maneatingmonkey @ 2007-03-10T06:24:00

2007-03-10T13:25:54Z

it's all outrageously misaligned. i missed my mark about 3 times this week. star trek. star trek, star trek, star trek. good night?

CAT BLUES

2007-03-03T01:29:50Z

a ghost. living on borrowed time. aspects of the spheres overshadowed by struggle with time, logic, and the very nature of being. shades of grey, morally ambiguous situations. divine intervention, the hard stalk in the center of a carrot. how rich it seems, smiling unerringly. but a shadow of a doubt. think happy thoughts. a very deep and intrinsic tiredness, which slows the course of time. beautiful classical strings. tender moments. the presence of loved ones. shed a tear for pictures, for such are proof that dreams never die. fly high, breathe deep. straight on til morning.

such a lovely blue pearl, framed by an overflowing cloak of black velvet; add a pinch of salt. and on that pearl were trillions of different colored pearls all dancing in rhythm. and on the inside of each pearl was another overflowing cloak of blackness, and deeper still inside that blackness, is a singular pearl of shining silvery white. x=1, order, love and harmony on this pearl. love and peace is this pearl.

set sail the winds of the high seas. the twin paradox. 'timelike' and 'spacelike' worldlines. rucksack revolution. bus schedules, canned beans, and cheese sandwiches. ol' scratch at your side. daybreak, daylight, sunset, twilight. boots. long, uncut hair. ol' country songs at your side. trains, planes, and automobiles. do not commit seppoku. repeat; do not commit seppoku. click your heels together. they just might make a sound. an old yellow couch, such a perfect place, to set your rucksack, as well as a coffee table calling two ol' hounddogs to sitdown. a clean shave, a glass of wine, a balcony with a view. quilts, porches, blackberrys and whiskey.

such are the tones of disaster. dancing on pure water, a great fog appears. lightning, thunderbolts. large suspending cables connecting one from the other. potential difference. noted. stable, like alice. unstable, like the cat. cords of silver wrap themselves around my neck, and i become x'. strands pull from all sides, stretching out more and more. to exist in many different places at once. living on borrowed time. a ghost.

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow

...Langston Hughes

WEIRDO EMAIL

2007-02-28T22:31:29Z

Lord.cosmos? Good! ? _ city _ crotch _ vote main point buying on possession not yet _ 賣? ? (Cash arriving at prefecture intersection percentage) ==? Possession (my person 或 with respect to public thing) _ city _ crotch _ vote main point place reason on not yet _ (buying 或賣)? ? == << _ city company crotch 權 mediation buying 賣 operation on excess 15,000 house not yet _ 經驗 >> ==? 缺錢 Mark good? The hand "賣"! Financial correcting/rule 劃 mark profitable power assistant "buying"! = It receives, 找 our! == Yayuu? 忙 comprehension not yet Kamiichi? Industry 發 spreading/displaying harmony foreground == 如 fruit 其 others possession demand? 忙轉 approaching/leaning Consulting 詢 heat wave: "0927? 686? 195 "simple teacher -== 對 non- happening hitting 擾? Ryo 這 right one seal 廣 announcement trust 如 possession possession hitting 擾 arriving at? The flax it receives noisily, 刪 removal thanking/apologizing thanking/apologizing! In regard to this company preparation hundred million fund it is close period opening? _ city with respect to each type _ city _ interest _ rice tub crotch vote resistance pushing loan business on not yet _, 歡迎 multi adding utilization? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? Rice field rice field? < It receives, existence? This trust, one flight? Buying after the day 賣 _ city _ crotch _ vote on not yet _ > Our mark email - 0927? 686? 195 simple teachers

Lord.cosmos

Lord.cosmos你好！你有未_上_市_股_票要買賣嗎？(現金到府交割)
==>你有（私人或公事上）未_上_市_股_票要處理（買或賣）嗎？
==>《超過15,000家未_上_市公司股權仲介買賣操作經驗》
==>你缺錢的好幫手「賣」！資金規劃的得力助手「買」！=>請找我！
==>也有幫忙了解未上市產業的發展和前景
==>如果其他人有需要幫忙轉寄

諮詢熱線：“０９２７－６８６－１９５”簡先生
-
==>對不起打擾你了這是一封廣告信如有有打擾到你麻煩請刪除謝謝！
本公司準備上億資金近期開辦各類上_市.未_上_市_興_櫃股票抵押借款業務,歡迎多加利用
█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█田田█
【請存檔本信,方便你日後買賣未_上_市_股_票】
我的email< chen-a999@umail.hinet.net > ~０９２７－６８６－１９５簡先生
mailto:chen-a999@umail.hinet.net

Lord.cosmos

Lord.cosmos如何七年賺十億？==>創投式==>０９１６－８１３－６３０
Tue, 27 Feb 2007 05:24:20 -0700